• “How would I describe myself? Three words. Hard-working, alpha male, jackhammer, merciless, instable.”,
• Whenever I’m about to do something, I think, would an idiot do that? And if they would, I do not do that thing.”
• “Babies are one of my many areas of expertise. Growing up, I performed my own circumcision.”
• “Nothing stresses me out. Except having to seek the approval of my inferiors.”
• “Through concentration, I can raise and lower my cholesterol at will.”
• “I never smile if I can help it. Showing one’s teeth is a submission signal in primates. When someone smiles at me, all I see is a chimpanzee begging for its life.”

Keychain included for take-everywhere fun!